It’s not unusual for kids to feel some pressure from their peers to get on social media, especially as they enter their teens. Just because “everyone’s doing it” though, doesn’t necessarily mean it’s the right moment for your child.
Technically, most social media platforms don’t allow children under 13 to create an account, but this is very weakly enforced, and many younger children do have accounts on these platforms. While some countries are exploring legal options to require stricter age verification, even if they do start to check the age of new account owners, is 13 really the right age for social media?
Ultimately, the choice lies with parents. Some do allow social media at 13, or even earlier. Many parents choose to only allow social accounts from 16 onwards. Or to allow an account on one platform only from 14, so that it’s easier to keep track of. Each of us needs to make this choice with our own child’s situation, needs, and character in mind.
Is my child ready?
A few things to consider when deciding if your child is ready for social media:
- Maturity Level: Can your child handle criticism or negativity without getting too down? Social media can sometimes bring harsh comments, so it’s important they can take it in stride.
- Understanding of Privacy: Do they get why keeping personal info private is a big deal? Before diving into social media, they should know what’s safe to share and what should stay off the internet, like where they live or anything too personal.
- Ability to Follow Rules: Is your child good at sticking to rules, whether at home or school? Social media has its own set of guidelines and safety rules, and they’ll need to be responsible enough to follow them.
- Communication Skills: Are they open with you about what’s happening in their world? It’s important that your child feels comfortable coming to you if they run into issues online, like bullying or seeing something inappropriate.
- Time Management: Can they balance their time between school, friends, and hobbies without getting glued to their phone? If they can manage screen time well, it’s a sign they might be ready.
- Critical Thinking: Can they tell the difference between real and fake information online? A bit of media savvy is important so they don’t get fooled by misinformation or fall for the wrong types of content.
Which social media to start with
Some parents like to start their kids off on a platform which they also use, because the personal familiarity with the platform makes it easier to understand what the child is doing and how to help if needed. That said, some social media channels will form a natural starting point for your child due to being where their peers are already spending time (if your child’s friends aren’t on social media yet, this is definitely a sign that it might be too early).
For some that will be Snapchat, for others Discord, for someone else TikTok. Whichever platform it is, initially limit them to the one platform, and encourage a type of social media use which emphasises interaction with friends you know in real life rather than meeting new people online.
Talk to them about the way they use the platform, the sorts of content they engage with, the amount and type of personal information they share a) with the platform itself, b) with other people.
As they demonstrate their maturity, it might be appropriate to add more platforms.